For a long time I have been interested in past lives. Have we all lived before? Are there people in our current lives who have been with us throughout time? And if so, why? I've never wanted to feel I've lived in a particular place and I've never been drawn to the notion of maybe I've been someone famous. I've simply been intrigued by the idea and wanted to explore it.
Through reiki, forums like this and the spiritual development group I attend, I've been able to meet like minded people and been able to begin this journey.
It all began with starting to discipline myself and do daily meditations. Here I began to meet a man. Middle Eastern - very handsome. His mouth would move but I would hear nothing. He played beach volleyball with me, served me Pimms and was a gentleman. Each time the bond grew stronger. I began to hear him. He spoke with an accent. He made me laugh and appears at the most bizarre times. Driving to work listening to the radio and a song comes on - he appears dancing and singing. It was Perry Como's Mambo song the other day. He took me places and began to show me the light.
So when I came to do my past life regression a week ago tonight, the guide I met at the door was him. When asked for his name, all I could get out was the letter h. I actually said, "Huh" but I couldn't hear.
I'll tell you where he took him. Make of it what you will. Is this my brain adding metaphors and making sense of deep emotions or did this once happen? To be honest I don't care as it was a wonderful place to go and from it I brought back with me many strengths and qualities.
I looked down at my feet and they looked bare. The place was hot, sunny and I was in a bust market. People bustling about and trading. They stared at me. I was wearing a long white dress. When asked where I was, I replied "Egypt" (the ego in my head was laughing at this point saying how typical. This is because for the last year I have developed a strong interest in Egyptian history). As I walked down the street, people stared at me and I didn't know why.
My guide took me to the quayside where people were loading a rather grand looking boat with sails.In the far distance I could see a procession heading towards me. A man surrounded by guards who were keeping people back.
He boarded the boat and I followed. I learnt we were sailing down the river to see a building he was having built. He wanted to inspect it. I was told to look at the man - I knew he was my husband. Looked older than me. When I look in his eyes I recognised him as my father in this life (the ego at this point was going "urgh that's disgusting" but the Guide and my heart told me it was true).
At the building site there was plenty of activity. Columns being erected and lots of work going on. The workers were scared of 'my husband' for who he was, but I wasn't scared. He was my husband and to me that's all he was.
From here the next scene was a lavish banquet. There was food,music and dancing. I was on a platform next to my husband and I was talking to a young man. I got the impression he was a soldier, but not a common soldier, and he was making laugh telling stories of his hunting prowess and generally showing off. While I'm telling this to the therapist, I start to feel quite hot under the collar and get very breathless and flustered. I realise I'm attracted to this young man and there's a feeling of great love and affection there. However, when I look into his eyes I do not recognise him at all.
We then move onto another scene. It's the woman I have seen in my meditations crying in the sand. The pain and the heartache is unbearable and I know realise it is me. This young man has been killed - murdered I discover by my husband. I feel a huge black hole in my heart and felt so icy cold, like a part of me had been torn away.
I then meet my past self and my husband round a campfire. This is where we tell each other how we felt and why we did what we did and make peace and cut the ties in order to move on. It seems my husband was jealous because of the age difference and had this man killed - a trap was set. He said he was sorry. I forgave him and I told him I loved him and that he simply had not understood my feelings for this other person. I got the feeling though it was deep love, it was not a physical one, it had never been consumated and therefore I felt not bad.
I was then asked whether my past self wanted to meet the man and I said yes. The minute he came to the fire I was sobbing my heart out. We hugged each other and kissed and then he told me I had to live my life and keep loving and that one day we would meet again.
Thinking that was over, I then found myself in a forest wearing black boots, red trousers and coat with a metal helmet on. I was in the English Civil War - a soldier fighting for the Parliamentarians. Though throughout this journey I kept hearing the word "turncoat" being shouted at me, which explained the mismatch uniform. I obviously kept switching sides. Here I had a wife and three children - (the wife turns out to be my mum in this life and my eldest daughter was or rather is my sister in this life) they were being interrogated by soldiers as to my wherebouts but they didn't know. I saw myself being killed in battle here. Round the fire, all my past life could say was that I was fighting for the cause as it was important, though he loved his family and would do anything to protect them. This man was very passionate about his beliefs, but his wife hated him and was angry for what she saw as being abandoned. Again we made out peace and cut the ties.
I felt these two lives have taught me lessons about who I am and the strengths and qualities I have. It also introduced me to my guide and I now have a name.
Now the question I ask is has my brain attributed these people in my life to these "strangers" I saw in these past lives? I wish I could draw as I can see them all as clear as day and they look nothing like anyone I know.
